Last Day In Denver

Today is my last day here in Denver. I really will miss everyone here and everything that goes on in this wonderful city. The more I travel around the more I despise living in Kearney. Seriously, the first moment that I can, I will leave that freaking town and move somewhere else. Now, now, I may realize that you might be thinking that some day I will want to movie back or crap like that, but in all honesty Kearney is not right for me. Enough of that bitching.

Today I indeed did go to the Japanese market again. I bought enough food supplies for me to last the rest of the summer and perhaps into when school starts again ^_^. I got a bunch of noodles and sauces to kick my vegetarian cooking up a few notches and some dried squid to eat and freak people out with. I also got this really cute can of lemonade that had bees on the can, FYI. To repay all the generosity and kindness to Monika and all her wonderful cooking and putting up with my 'flaiming' personality, I got her this totally awesome Japanese mini collector thingy. There are many sets to collect, but we got the mini cleaning supplies. This stuff is so freaking awesome. I know that I could easily waste a lot of money. We also got all this pocky and melon creme soda. Oh oh, I also got a six pack of Ramune, I am going to leave the rest in the fridge for Josh and Monika.

Whatever... Yesterday I was going to write about all the rain, thunder, and lightning. I have never seen it rain so hard since I was in Louisiana... I guess that wasn't so long ago... anyway the thunder was so loud that it was setting off car alarms in the parking lot and you could really feel the sound hit you, I know that sounds strange, but believe me.

Now Andy, if you by chance actually read this I don't want to hear your whining. I do realize that this is a rambling 'personal diary' type entry but I don't really give a shizzle about what you think.

Bed Time

Slacker

That's what I am. I have not written in such a long time. Why did I stop? Because I am too lazy to use the internet at my house. Right now I am visiting my best friend Josh and his girlfriend Monika. I am having a really good time here being away from Kearney and work and mostly everything. I can completely be myself here. I haven't done too much here, just relaxing, which is fine with me.

Jeff, you are the only other person who actually reads this so here is a personal message to you: I miss you! I would call you, but I am roming right now so I will have to wait.

I am going to hang out and do something fun later today and I hope to go to the Japanese market again to pickup some good supplies for my cooking back home in Kearney.

ARGG!!!!!! I had a lot more typed up here, but then for some reason almost half of it got deleted!! I don't really feel like re typing it now... sorry.

End

Inspiration From A Likely Source

Today and yesterday I finally put together some photo albums off all the stuff that has been going on for the past year. This was all because of the inspiration by Jeff. Hopefully sometime soon I will show this stuff to you.

Side note: I just won the internet game between myself and step-dad, lol

So anyway I covered the small album with paper sack because I hated the way it looked. It took longer than I thought because I thought I would be all fancy with it when I should have just done it old school book cover way from the start. I put a lot of newly printed pictures into a black album that I was given about a year ago and it is about half full.

As I went through my computer to find pictures I realized that I have A LOT of pictures of myself, I am almost vain! In the black album there are only 4 of myself even though I could have probably filled a third of it with pictures of just myself.

So anyway I got that job out of the way, but I still haven't got the big job out of the way. Airtight, you can slap me on the wrist. I know I said I would do that yesterday, but still a lack of courage.

Nite all.

Past Few Days

I haven't blogged in a few days because I have not had the ambition to go plug my computer into the internet. Yes, I am still living in the stone age of computers; my parents still have a dial-up connection, yech.

Random thought: leather is awesome.

Anyway, today I did some yard work for my grandparents. Mowing was fine, just took a long time. The more exciting part was using the hedge trimmer. For most people this would be just another chore, but for me it was pure delight. Shaping these ugly hedges into perfect rectangular monuments brought an unusual joy to my day.

I also had a nice chat with Jeff about everything and that is all better. I was just freaking myself out and worrying about nothing.

Ya, that's about it for now.

Mind Spinning

Thinking does no good. One must take action. Lately I have been thinking about a lot and taking no action. Yes, yes, you all know what I think about... telling parents, moving, relationships... well it is about time that something is done about every one of those things. Just doing it is the hard part. It is so easy to bitch and moan on the net because no one will really read this and if someone does it really doesn’t make a huge difference to me.

Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, you again become the topic of one of my problems. In the coming days we will have to have a real conversation about where our 'relationship' is going. I know from the start it was only to have fun, but I think that we are not on the same page in this relationship. Maybe I am just freaking out and have thought myself into confusion/worry, but nevertheless I have some true feelings I need to get out before things get even more serious between us. To me it seems that everything that I wanted in the beginning isn't what I want now... I thought it would be fun to mess around, but now, even though we are not exclusive, I still have this emptiness I thought a 'relationship' could fill and I am left feeling still empty and with strange guilt.

Enough of this, I am getting too venty on the whole subject. G'Night.

Simple LIfe

I wish that I had a simple life. Not to sound redundant, but life would be so much easier! Maybe I should move in with the Amish people and raise barns all day and churn some butter. Sew some quilts and build a desk or two for selling to the public. No that would suck. Never mind.

I am pretty much bummed out all the time for no apparent reason (not really), but doing a good job faking being happy to the world around me.

Jeff, you're the greatest. I just feel guilty that I am doing all this stuff with you and I will be leaving so soon.... [sob] I guess what happens happens.

I saw Damon at Perkins tonight and he was his usual bitchy self-- complaining about whatever he can just to get some more attention.

Bed.

Hard Labor Sucks

I did the good thing by helping my dad lay irrigation pipe for the past two days and it completely sucked. There was absolutely noting rewarding about this experience. End.

Update: I was Damon's 'flava of the week' or rather just four days. While I was gone he already found another boyfriend. That whore deserves any STD that he gets, seriously.

Ok, that's all I care to write about for now. I am too tired to care anymore at the moment.


[passes out from exhaustion]